Is not at all common. I’ve long contended that there are only 3 letters of the alphabet you need to know when you work in retail sales. W..T..F.. WHAT THE FUCK! This has been a strange fall so far. I don’t know what the deal is but I had better luck in the summer dealing with the up-tight down-state people than I have had all fall now with the locals. It seems the locals have all gone LOCO! Half the time I think I continue in this line of work just becuase of the pure amusement I get from some of the dweebs that come in to shop at the store.
Now before I continue, anyone that knows me understands that while I am harshly judgmental to many people, I am never that way to their face. It’s not my place to stand there and tell you that you’re a fool, it’s far more amusing to me for you to figure that out on your own (while I watch). AND, while I do indeed come across (especially in this blog) as being a know-it-all smart-ass there are some things in life that even people with very little brain function can accomplish better than some of the people that I see every day. Bathing is one of them. Reading directions is another.
Today I had not one but two people ask me how to clean up after painting with latex paint. Not at all an unfair question if the cans they were reading as they were asking the question had not said “EASY SOAP AND WATER CLEAN-UP!” in huge bold letters across the front. I had another man ask me if he could safely seal his driveway if it was raining. Where do these people come from? COMMON SENSE PEOPLE!! This was also quite a day for correcting (or trying to) people’s poor color judgment. People hate picking out colors for their paint. They would much rather ask someone else to do it for them. Experience however has created a rule in my department that we (employees) are NEVER to choose a color for a customer. We can guide them and get them to the right pallet but it is up to THEM to choose the color. Many times I play a little game with my customers who ask me to choose their color. I will go and find the most HIDEOUS color they could imagine and then let them know that I think it’s a swell color for their paint. This shuts them up REALLY quickly and they go back to choosing it themselves. Folks, after all, YOU have to live with it and look at it everyday. What do I care if your wall is a BABY SHIT GREEN! Unfortunately, picking colors is far to arduous a task for many people who end up hating the color they picked out and without fail they come back to the store and bitch at ME becuase they made a poor choice. It is amazing in retail how many different things I am blamed for. From paint that these people think I personally made for them in the HUGE FUCKING FACTORY behind work to the wheels on the shopping carts that I’m supposed to have a spare of at my desk JUST for them. I’m somewhat glad that technology is not as good as it could be just to spite these fuckers that blame me for their poor choices. I tell them to look at the swatches and show me what color they think their paint should be and then I fix it so it looks like that. Generally a 30 minute process. Not fun when you have 15 people waiting for help and only 2 machines to accomplish this task….that’s the other thing I hate. What ever happened to the virtue of being patient? NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW….fuck you jack ass, go somewhere else and wait in line there. We are 30 times faster and more accurate than our pathetic competition up here. Take it or leave it!
OK I’m doing bitching. Tomorrow is another Sunday and you all know how much I just LOVE Sunday as the scarasm drips off the sweat in my armpit (too descriptive?) So, eventually I’ll get new photos uploaded, mabye tomorrow night after work. Good Night!
